However, I do tend to exhibit the "old man" sort of behaviors every so often. I can be forgetful, I can talk about ailments with the best of them, I definitely can be crotchety with those darned neighborhood kids and well, my ass can dial my BlackBerry.
So after I get into work, I'm talking to cube-neighbor Bob and I hear my phone ring. It was on my desk so I didn't get to it in time to answer, but I picked it up. It almost immediately rang again. I'm thinking maybe it's someone calling to wish me happy birthday, but I get this.
"Naperville 911, what is the emergency?"
"Uh, I don't know, there is no emergency"
"Are you sure no one there needs any assistance?"
"Uh, yeah, pretty sure"
"Okay we just want to make sure that no one is in need of medical assistance"
"Yeah, i must have accidentally dialed, sorry"
I know my ass is, well, not petite, but seriously? I had the phone locked, how did it do it? Well, there's an emergency call button on BlackBerries even if they are locked. But that means my ass would have had to have hit that button and then hit it again (since it confirms you want to do that before calling)
I'm sure this has happened to many people but it really played with my mind since it was on my birthday. Welcome to the 43rd year of my life, rang in by my ass dialing 911.
Maybe my ass knows something about me that I don't. I'm sure it sees a different side of my life every day.
So what can your ass do?
See, I'm fitting in to this old man lifestyle by inappropriately talking about body parts, functions and ailments just fine!!