25 August 2009

My newest $1,000,000 idea

Yep, once again, I post a meeeeeelion dollar idea on the public interwebby for anyone to steal.

4 simple letters: IGCS: The International Gelato Certification Society

I'm am SO sick and tired of stores, restaurants and every Tom, Dick & Harry (ooh err) calling the frozen messes that they are humping, GELATO. It's not, it's ice cream or some weak-ass attempt at it.

You can call me a "fancy man" because I've been to Italy twice. Yet, although my Yelp profile carries the moniker "Best Knife & Fork Man in the 630/331 Area Code", I'm pretty darn qualified to be an objective judge on foods that come from yonder as well, and gelato is definitely one of them.

There is just something so insanely rich, fatty and flavorful from ANY gelateria you visit in Italy that once you have it, you're ruined for life. It's SO good, that without writing them down, I remembered EACH shop which were our favorites in Rome and walked right into them on our second visit.

Of course, as most of you know how my brain works, it was the one at that one end of Piazza Navona, named after some brothers and that one right to the right side of the Pantheon (as you're looking at the entrance). Just stick with me and you'll be wolfing it down in no time. There's also that one on the one end of the Ponte Vecchio bridge in Florence as well.

So these are my qualifications. In fact, these branch out into incredible chocolate cannolis in Taormina (Sicily) and wickedly thick Chocolate de la taza in Barcelona so I sense "offshoot" Societies once the IGCS is up and established.

The Mission of the IGCS is simple. Enforce long-established quality control standards and recipes for gelato. Set the bar properly so that even when a mullet-wearing hillbilly tastes it, he knows that this ain't no 31 flavors stuff. If you fail, you will NOT be allowed to call it as such. If you succeed, you get our special certification seal which tells anyone in the world that your product is authentic and cuts the mustard. Of course, there's fees for someone to EARN this certification just as one would have for ISO9000 or Six Sigma, etc.

We'd be sort of the "Kosher" approval for gelato. Think of it... you've gotta admit, this is genius and I would HOPE that all Italian gelateria shoppe owners would appreciate this so that their products are upheld as the ones to shoot for.

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